Najah and Ron met on Christian Mingle and, although it took them 7 months to arrange a first date, once they met in person they knew they had something amazing. They were married on April 4th, 2019. Christian Mingle is so pleased to have played a role in their love story and wishes them every joy for their future together.
How did you meet? What was your first date like? Tell us all the details!
After a month with zero luck I was already giving up. I had tried other dating sites and hadn’t gone on a single date with anyone! I decided to keep trying for another month as I let my subscription lapse, and on the second to last day, Ron messaged me. “Hi! How are you? :)”
From then on we messaged each other nonstop day after day after day… For various reasons, including each of us pumping the breaks on the relationship at different times, our first date was 7 months after we met. We both lived in Illinois, but he lived near St. Louis and I lived near Chicago, so our first date was a weekend long!
We were nervous about this, but from the moment I opened my front door, and he was standing there with my favorite candy, all doubts melted away. We had dinner at a steakhouse, saw Hidden Figures, he stood awkwardly in a too-loud bar while I tried in vain to get him to dance with me, and then we visited the River Walk in the town where I went to high school and walked hand-in-hand under an umbrella in the snow.
The next day we spent the day in downtown Chicago, which included a trip to the Field Museum, freezing as we sat on Lake Michigan and dangled our feet over the water, and concluded with dinner with my family. Saturday was supposed to be the last day we saw each other, but we had such a good time that we woke up before the sun rose on Sunday to have breakfast together before he left.
Describe the moment you knew it was true love!
I had been falling in love with him (and trying to slow myself down) for awhile. On our very first date, when we arrived at the steak house he had a gift for me. Before, while we had been getting to know each other, we had a conversation about how I was able to pronounce “Worcestershire” and he couldn’t and I tried to teach him and he refused to learn my methods despite my best efforts.
So while we were still in the car, he reached into the back seat and pulled out a framed certificate of achievement “for being able to pronounce Worcestershire.” Right then in my heart I knew I was going to marry him
What advice would you give other Christian Mingle members?
Trust God to give you what is best for you. It sounds too simple, so please let me explain. Before I met my now husband, I was in an awful, on again off again, long distance, 10 year long relationship that had started when I was 13 (yes, 13). I was convinced I was going to marry that guy, even though every single day with him was a complete struggle and I was miserable. After he finally ended it once and for all, I took 2 years to recover and learn who I was without a burdensome relationship.
When I was ready to start dating again at age 25, I had simple but specific guidelines. 1. Do not date long distance. 2. Nothing serious right away, date casually. 3. No games. Be direct, communicate. I didn’t even really know who I was interested in! In fact, my husband Ron has many attributes that I specifically said I wasn’t interested in, like being a musician and being a pastor! But I had zero dates. None in real life, none from dating sites.
Thank goodness I had another very important rule. 4. Listen to what God wants for me. This was important because in 3 days, my first 2 rules were broken. Ron and I liked each other so much he mentioned one day taking a trip together. While that excited me, I freaked out! There were several times during our relationship where I pushed him away. One time I hurt him so badly that when I came back to him and apologized he said that he forgave me, but for awhile we just needed to be friends.
I obliged for a few months. When I was tired of being just friends, I told him I didn’t want to talk anymore because it was getting too painful. But that if he ever changed his mind, I would love to date him. A month later he came around, and the month after that was our first date!
Often times, God gives us exactly what we asked for, it just doesn’t come in the package we thought it would
I’m telling you all this because we all make plans. We make plans so that we can have a way to just START, to move forward, and also to protect ourselves. But I want to caution you not to clutch so tightly to those plans that we miss what God is showing us. Because often times, God gives us exactly what we asked for, it just doesn’t come in the package we thought it would.
I met my ex when I wasn’t a Christian, and when I was still a child, when I didn’t know anything about real Godly love. I mistook attention for love and drama for passion. And I chose him even though I was changing my goals, damaging my relationship with my family, and even though I didn’t want the life he wanted. I wasn’t listening to God.
Fast forward 12 years and I almost rejected what I had been wanting for so long, and the beautiful life God had in store for us, because he didn’t seem to fit my plan. Again, I wasn’t listening to God, but praise Him, he opened my eyes. Trust God to give you what is best for you.
Did you find love online? Inspire other Christian singles by sharing your story of how you met your soulmate on Christian Mingle. Or join us today to start the search for the one your soul loves!
